Monday, September 12, 2011

Feeling Yourself!

Ok, I will admit it....I started FEELING MYSELF! I had way too much new found confidence. I was getting men approaching me, people were telling me how "skinny" I look. I know I am 5'10...but I am not sure how a 200lb woman can look skinny, but hell...I took it and ran with it! Like a bat out of hell. One must remember, it had been many years since I had any kind of attention like I was getting now. And being that I live in the South now...it is a whole different ball game out here. Now I was "thick" instead of the everyday fat girl! I was like, "Ok...I see you Krystle! Doing your thing!"

Well I had to shake myself today...and say "You still have more to lose girl, don't stop just because you got a few compliments."

Truth of the matter is...compliments or not, I still was not where I wanted to be as it pertains to sizes I wanted to be in. I am happy that I can go to Target and find stuff now, but I want to find it in a 9 or 11 not a 15 or 17. So I need to refocus and fast! I have to remember why I started this journey...not for some compliments and a few cat calls...FOR ME! I started this in order to get myself back, feel good in my skin and hell wear a bathing suit in the summer and some shorts!

I am happy to report that I have been wearing tanktops the last few weeks without feel self-conscious....now the next step is being able to wear shorts without look like I have THUNDER thighs. Now don't get me wrong I don't want to look like Olive Oil either...but I need to lose at least another 30lbs and drop about 2 more pant sizes before I feel like I am back to me....

Alright Krystle....get it together mama! You got this and you need to get it by the end of December. No more changing my mini-goal dates and rewards! I have come too far to stop now!

The Month of August

Wow! Where do I start with my feelings about August and what it did to my psyche? Well for starters I took a trip back home to California. It was the first time a lot of my family and friends have been me in a year! Everyone was happy to see my success in weight loss and how far I had come since the last time I had been home. This honestly felt great for me to hear. At the same time it was a curse. My original goal was to lose 40 more pounds from where I am now...well with a lot of my family and friends saying they didn't think I had another 40 to lose, I started to rethink my personal goal. I started to think maybe I didn't have that much to lose at all.

Well after coming home...I slacked off BIG time with working out and eating. My eating was sporadic, when I ate at all and working out...was not happening AT ALL! This was a dissappointing because I had worked so hard to build up a love for working out and how it improved my mood...now I just felt unmotivated to do anything of the sort. So I have been in a major funk and I couldn't figure out the reason why...well now I know EXACTLY why