Friday, December 4, 2009

3 Weeks Down

So after this 3rd week I have lost a total of 12lbs and almost 2 pant sizes! I will say that I have not been working out as much as I should be. For example, this week I only worked out 2 times so far. So I definitely have to get a work out in this Sunday. That way it is at least 3 times for the week. But I have been really good with the calories, no slip ups and actually eating under 1200 cals a day..but not by choice. It just happens to end up that way.

So next week I am looking to work out 4 or 5 times for the week. I actually found that I dont mind working out when I get home from work at 1am....it is a good way to end my night.

The most wonderful feeling of all of this is having other people tell me that it looks like I am losing weight. Because it is one thing when you think it...but for someone else who doesnt even know you are trying is telling you that they can see it...it is like a breathing a sigh of relief like, "Its working....dont stop now"

I will say that it is interesting still that the people that I would think would support me the most...arent really. Mainly, familt members...my mom and grandie are great! But it is like everyone else is more discouraging the encouraging. But I have just chalked it up as they not being comfotable enough with themselves...plain and simple.

I am really excited now and there is no stopping me...because I know that I can do it...and I will! Thanks for taking the time to read! It really means a lot.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

2 Weeks down

So after the second week I am still feeling good. But I did not have as much restraint as I would hae liked to have. Needless to say I have had a couple of slip ups last weekend. Like I said, the weekends are always the hardest because those are my off days and I am running around a lot more often. But that is no excuse....I still am coming in at a total weight loss so far of 9lbs...However, I need to kick it up a notch. I have decided that I am not going to weigh myself again until December 5th. I do not want to be one of those people that obssess over the scale. I will say that I have noticed a difference in how my pants are fitting. They are a lot looser in the waist!!! Which is wonderful and makes me feel a lot better. Because I know that what I am doing is working.

The 1st week was sooo much easier than the 2nd week which I thought was weird. But I have figured out that it is mentally tougher. Because in your mind you think "Well I have lost 8lbs....whats one cheeseburger, or one soda?" But I know that this is how bad habits start. I am still doing really well at just plain ol turning people down when they offer me food, that I know I should not be eating. And the support that I have been getting is great! So I will keep you all posted about my next weigh in!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

1 Week Down

So after my first week with this 1200 calorie thing...I am feeling great and have lost 6lbs....well 7 because I weighed myself today! I am really excited about it because I know that my hard work is paying off.

I have decided to work out 5 days a week this week instead of 4 and I am going to start using my Core Ryhthms tapes...they are basically doing Latin Dance move and making it into exercise...and it soooo is! You will be sweating after just the first tape. So this will be working my core and the walking will be working my bottom half.

I have defintely found that the weekends are the hardest. These are the days that I have off and I am usually running around and taking my son places i.e. to the park, to get more clothes, or with me shopping. So it was very tempting to stop and get something in a drive-thru but I didn't and I was really excited about that.

It is such a wonderful feeling to know that what you are doing is working...and I so needed this to keep me motivated. Because although you can eat anything you want within reason, there are things that you want to avoid because you know that you will not get full and it defeats the purpose. So it is all about making smarter choices.

I will let you guys know how it is going towards the end of this week. Thank you all for the support, it really keeps me going.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

So it has been a week since I last wrote...but anywho.

I started on the 1200 calorie a day thing Monday and it is Thursday and I am feeling great! The first day was rough, I was getting headaches and feeling like crap...but by day 2 I was fine.

I really feel like the trick is writing down EXACTLY what you eat and planning your day out as far as what you are going to eat. That way if you are on the go with your snack, you have already written down and know what you are putting in your mouth. Also, the trick is definitely to eat every 2 to 3 hours. If it weren't for me doing that, I would have been done! So your body never goes into starving mode...it kind of alerts me when I need to put something in my mouth.

I count every calorie now, as well as my fat grams per day, carbs per day, protein and sodium intake. I got this really great food journal that helps you track all of it, for every meal and then your totals at the end of the day.

I have found that in a day, I don't even make it to 1200 calories, I am usually around 1000-1100...but I am not hungry! Which is amazing to me. So now I see that most of the time I was just overeating when my body did not need it.

I am also walking 2 miles a day.....everyday and the days that I do not get to it...I strap on my workout shoes and do it on the treadmill at work! So for 4 days straight now, I have been walking. Which is seriously a record or something for me! LOL

I definitely have come to some realizations in this process. I know how people always say "You shouldn't deprive yourself when you are on a diet" But honestly there are some cases where you do have to do that...I mean realistically, I cannot eat a piece of banana cream pie or of chocolate cake. I just can't do that, I just can't drink a Dr. Pepper or have an In N Out Double Double...I can't! And there comes a point where you don't want to. Especially, when you are writing everything down that you put in your mouth. Because it is all about accountability. Same thing with have cheat days...they should really call it a cheat meal..because you CANNOT have a whole day of eating everything that you want. What I did was say...."Ok, I am only giving myself one day a month to eat off track, and that does not mean every meal" So I said Thanksgiving, Xmas, and My Birthday. One a month and that is it....and I have to instead of doing 2 miles I am going to have to do 4 or do 2 miles and aerobics. You have to know that in order for you to lose weight, you have to sometimes be a little hard on yourself.

However, I am just speaking for me, what I am having to do in order to lose weight. Everyone is different and different things work for different people. But being accountable and realisitc applies to anyone trying to lose or get healthy. I have a whole fridge full of sodas and I have not touched one. I had a banana cream pie (my fav), birthay cake, my boyfriend made eggs, biscuits, and sausage for breakfast today and I didnt even think twice about eating. A Co-worker brought in cupcakes that she made for us, there was one left here that was suppose to be for me...and I threw it away. Because I knew that that was what I have to do, and need to do...for me! And I am sooooo proud of myself....and that is how I know that I am doing this, FOR ME!

My blood pressure has gone down, which is great! So I can see that this is already starting to work. I am at the point where I am extremely happy that people are supporting me. But at if no one was, I would still be doing this because I feel like I am my biggest coach and I am the star player of my own team.

I am blessed and so happy, and still pray to God each night to keep me focused...and I think this is the way of him telling me that I always had it in me...he is just there just in case I stumble.

Friday, November 6, 2009

1200 Calories? Really?!

As you all know I had a doctor's appointment this past Wednesday.

Well I went to the doctor and she gave me three medication options:Phentermine, Alli, and some other one that I can't remember the name of. Well it turns out that my blood pressure is too high 140/88 to take the Phentermine and the unnamed medication. Which made me a little dissappointed, because I know phentermine works really well. However, she did give me a little grim news about how it can cause heart valve problems up to a year after you are off the medication! So this freaked me out a little bit since heart valve problems run in my family. Long story short, I decided to go with the Alli.

I am waiting to see if my insurance will cover it, since technically I have been diagnosed with obesity. But in the mean time, my doctor let me know that I need to now go on a 1200 calorie a day diet! I must have looked at her like she was crazy!!! Now, I don't know what I normally eat in a day...but something tells me that a double cheeseburger, large fry, and dr. pepper are definitely not going to be in my near future. So she had me buy a food journal, and starting Monday I have to write down what I eat. Her exact words were, "I want to know EVERYTHING that goes into your mouth. If you pick up a grape in the grocery store to eat it, you better right it down!" Yikes!

With all this said, I do like that she is making me be accountable for what I am putting in my mouth. She also wants me to up my working out to 6 days a week! I didn't remember signing up for The Biggest Loser...but ok! Fair enough. Like I said, she is making me accountable and is basically in this thing with me...which I like, because most doctors wouldn't give a shit! They would just prescribe the pills and tell me to be on my marry way.

So goodbye Dr. Pepper, and Banana Cream Pie....goodbye Mickey D's and Pizza Hut.....and HELLO Lean Cuisine and Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breasts!

I have also decided to do some before pictures.....you know like how they do in The Biggest Loser....I think it will be a good reminder of where I know longer want to be. I am also going to do some new measurements...just to make sure that the other ones were not off.

Wish me luck!

K. BROCK....OUT!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Doctors Appointments Tomorrow

So I have two very important doctors appointments tomorrow, this will help me get my plan in motion, if all goes well. I am still keeping everyone in suspense, because I want it to be a personal choice for me that I know is the right one.

I went back and looked at old pictures of myself and am so embarrassed that I let myself get to this point. I know when people see me now from high school they are talking shit about how I gained weight. Long story short, I went from being a pretty fit and trained athlete to this. My body fat content back then was around 16-18% which is really good for a woman and I am scared to know what the hell it is now.

With that being said, I am going to put an old picture of me in my wallet and on my mirror at home to remind me of what I can be, and what I should be. I need to pull out all stops at this point to motivate myself!

I will let you all know how the appointments go and just keep me in your prayers and well wishes!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Slowly But Surely.....

So I realized that setting up a daily schedule is really a good idea! In the past 3 days I have had a couple of eating slip ups but nothing too major. I have been preparing and bringing my dinner to work, so I am not tempted to go eat out and 2 days this week I have done a 2 mile walk with the baby. I didn't even realize that it was two whole miles until I did the same route in the car. I was so proud of myself...as dumb as that may sound!

So tomorrow, I have to have to get to the gym for at least 1.5 hours, just so I can get that part of my plan in action.

My doctor's appointment went well, and he gave me a viable option that I may be starting soon. I am not going to tell you all what it is....but it is something that I feel will be a huge help and once I meet my goal weight I will fill you all in. Thank you so much for the support...even a couple of comments every now and then definitely helps.....

Keep me in your prayers!

Friday, October 23, 2009

I Have Simmered Down Now!

Ok so after the bad news that I got about the OptiFast the other day...I am feeling a lot better.

I have a friend that works for a doctor that is going to see what options I have as far as treatment solutions. This same friend also found out that her gym takes my insurance for personal training sessions!!! WHAT?! I am really excited about that, I love this girl seriously...because she herself has lost a lot of weight and knows that feelings and emotions that you go through when you are trying...so she has been a huge help to me!

So I have an appointment on Tuesday with him and I am really excited about that. Since I am still going to be on the night shift, I just have to create a more regimented schedule for my days that includes exercise! After I post this blog, I am going to sit down and create a daily schedule for myself, so that I don't have an excuse to not do what I am suppose to do.

Monday, October 26th is the start to a new beginning and I am not going to let anyone or anything stop me..because this is for me!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

So sad

Ok, so I made all the stuff for the master cleanse and I was jolted to a stop after I spoke with a doctor on the phone. The long and short of it is that the cleanse is good to clean out your system but the fact that the only calorie intake you are getting is from maple syrup....it is not the healthiest thing nourishment wise.

So I said "Ok, fine!" Then I looked into seeing a doctor about weight management, particularly Optifast. So I was really excited to making the appointment and see the doctor next week. This is until I asked how much the cost for the shakes are and it comes up to $150.00 a week! Really?! I cannot afford that! So this of course, makes me completely discouraged. I just feel like everytime I plan to do something to change how I look and/or feel, I get knocked 10 steps back. Just like now, I have to stay on the night shift (5pm-2am) so it completely threw off the schedule that I had set up.

But you know what, I have decided to get back to the gym next week. I am going to go before work and my boyfriend is just going to sacrifice taking care of the baby for one more hour so that I can be healthier. Plain and simple! This is like how I went to Target and as I am looking at it the Plus size section and it is literally mixed in with the Maternity section! WTF?! In my head I was thinking of it like Target saying, "Are you pregnant or just fat?!" It just burned me up and reminded me of how much I hate shopping....and I can't do that anymore.

I gotta take control and just say "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade."

I will check back in soon and let everyone know whats going on. But PERSERVERANCE is the word for the day.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Starting the Master Cleanse Tomorrow

Ok, so I start the master cleanse tomorrow morning!

I still haven't decided if I want to do 3 days or the full 10...I feel like it is really going to depend on how much I can mentally take it. But I do know that after 3 days, your intestinal track is completely cleaned out and then I would have to do raw fruits and veggies for a couple of days. Which wouldn't be that bad. However, if I do the 10 days I would have to drink pure orange juice on day 11 and broth on day 12. So it is really going to be mind over matter. So for the embarrasing part:

Chest:45
Right Arm-17
Left Arm-16
Waist-44(So ridiculous)
Hips-54
Left Thigh-28
Right Thigh-30

It is possible that they are a little off...but I am pretty sure that this still means that I am too big.

My goal weight is 166...but I will shoot for 175. I am giving myself until June 1, 2010 to lose at least 50lbs. I this is a big number but I will still be taking it day by day. I also know that I may lose more inches than weight a certain point.

There is one way I am looking at it....the way my body type is (larger bones), my ancestry (All my aunts on my mom's father's side are bulit like Queen Latifah). I will never be a size 4 and I am not trying to be.

So wish me luck blog fam! I will be back tomorrow to let you know how the cleanse is going.

Friday, October 16, 2009

New Beginning






Ok, so my girl Genie started one of these for her weight loss plan a couple of days ago and she has totally inspired me.






Anyways, with that being said I am going to air out my stuff too....because I know that I am going to need the support. Long story short...Im a fat ass right now! I use to weight about 100lbs less 6 years ago and it is tearing me a part to look in the mirror and see something and someone that I am not happy with. So I have decided that I need to take control of the situation.






I started gaining weight when I left for college. I started working more, later hours, 18 units a semester and I was homesick. So I turned to eating and not taking care of myself. Gradually, I just got bigger, bigger and bigger. And now I am at a point where it is embarrassing to hang around some of my friends, because I don't want to be looked at as "the fat girl" I already stick out, I am 5'10" JESUS.






I want to be able to play around with my son and not get winded, I want to play volleyball and softball again. I don't think there is anything worse than knowing that I use to be a serious athlete, and now I couldn't run around a track if you paid me!






Right now I am 5"10 and 260lbs. And I know some of you may read this and not believe this...but let me be the first to tell you that the color black is a fat girls best friend! :) But all jokes aside I am moving to Atlanta soon and when I come back to visit California for my good friend Genie's wedding I want to look like the "new and improved" old me! For some of you who are new to knowing me, you have no idea what I use to look like...but I will make sure to post old pictures.









My official start date is October 26, 2009 (This is when my work shift is going to change to days instead of the 5pm-2am I am doing now)






I feel like this will be the easiest way for me to form a schedule when I am working in the day.






So all I need is your love, support and prayers because I know it is not going to be easy and I need to take action now. I owe it to myself and my son to be a healthy, happy, and confident woman. Please follow me on my journey, and in the process I hope to inspire and encourage other women out there to take control of their lives.









"I Can Do All Things Through Christ Who Strengthens me" Phil 4:13