Friday, July 15, 2011

Need to Be Just As Strong For Myself

Well I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I am in one heck of a funk for the past couple weeks in the sense of my own personal development. My workouts have been sporadic, and my eating has been the same. The only good thing is, I haven't gained any weight. I am just feeling "blah" for whatever reason.

I don't know if it is that feeling of being "almost there" and wanting it to be over already. Or if it is the compliments I am getting and feel like "I would be ok if I was this same weight" Either way, I know that in my heart, I am not 100% happy with where I am now, and know that I need to get off my ass and keep pressing on.

I totally think this is the point that I was worried about in the beginning of my journey....that point of wanting to just stop for a while, stop logging, stop working out, stop caring...if even it was for a moment. But I CANNOT!!! I have way too many people counting on me to prove that this can be done. I am not Super Woman and just have to be a real person, with real feelings, doubts and insecurties.

Prime example, I could look in the mirror a month ago, and be so proud of my progress. Now, I look at the same reflection and see that my stomach isn't flat enough, my thighs are not small enough, I still can't wear a tanktop or shorts. Very weird feeling. But I may just need to sit back and reflect on how far I have come. I think it is so much more the metal aspect of all of this more than anything.

I WILL get over this! This too shall pass and I am going to come stronger than before! I HAVE to do this for me...I have to do this FOR ME!

2 comments:

  1. Developing emotional strength is not the same as becoming invulnerable. In fact, vulnerability is crucial in developing your ability to connect with others and to fully experience and accept yourself.

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  2. Nice post. There are a lot of ways to get stronger. Adding more resistance, adversity, or stress is one way, learning how to adapt to the challenge is another, and adopting dialectical thinking.

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